As adolescents, 13 and 14-year-olds are in a stage of life where they are developing their sense of self and identity. This process can often lead to excessive thinking and worrying about issues, especially when it comes to social interactions and relationships. At this age, teenagers tend to rely heavily on the opinions of their peers, seeking validation and confirmation from friends before making decisions. While seeking guidance from friends can be helpful, overthinking and constantly seeking validation can lead to several challenges.
There are a few reasons why young teenagers tend to overthink issues and seek confirmation from friends. Firstly, this age group is still developing their decision-making skills and may lack the confidence to make independent choices. Secondly, teenagers are highly influenced by their peers and social media, which can lead to FOMO or being excluded from their social groups. This fear can cause them to seek constant validation and reassurance from their friends, leading to overthinking and second-guessing their decisions.
Overthinking can be a challenging habit to break, but there are a few strategies that can help. It’s important to identify when you are overthinking and try to refocus your attention on something else. Engaging in a physical activity or hobby can help distract your mind from overthinking and reduce anxiety. Mindfulness and meditation techniques can also be useful in grounding your thoughts and bringing your attention back to the present moment.
Another strategy is to practice making decisions independently. This can help build confidence in your decision-making skills and reduce the need for constant validation from friends. Start by making small decisions on your own. Gradually work up to larger decisions, such as choosing which extracurricular activities to participate in.
It’s also important to remember that seeking guidance and validation from friends is not inherently bad. However, it’s important to understand the extent to which you rely on others for validation and try to cultivate a sense of self-trust. This can be done by reflecting on your own values and beliefs and making decisions based on what feels true to you, rather than solely seeking approval from others.
Finally, it’s important to recognize that everyone experiences overthinking to some degree, especially during adolescence. Talking to a trusted adult or counsellor can be helpful in gaining perspective and developing coping strategies.
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Cheers Gail
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